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| Serenely crashing down with uncaring contempt taunting les grimpeurs who dare swim against its flow. (Céüse, Les Hautes-Alpes) |
Emotionally hemorrhaging from draconian actions by someone I deeply cared about, I staunch my grief with what had always brought me personal meaning. I voyage to France, finding enrichment again in travel, climbing, food, and friendship. These temporary joys will be a lachrymatory; a vial which apocryphally served to contain a griever's tears, to be open to dry, and when so thus indicate the period of mourning is finally allowed to be over. Céüse climbing information at the end (or click here). Okay let's go:
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| The wheelhouse of requisite climbing technique here completely dumbfounds my gumby brain. (Secteur Cascade, Montagne de Céüse) |
Day one Dylan and I hit the ground running, barreling out the gates at the wee hour of 10am. Time is of the essence as we expeditiously make pitstops for croissants, groceries, crag sandwiches, and mandatory café. Literally *everyone* was shocked when we finally got to the parking lot so late. The oppressive afternoon sun cackles gleefully as we start the hour-long uphill approach at the worst possible time.
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| "Look," I say irritably to the photo-bombing moth, "as two grown-ass men there's no way we're lost, okay?" (Céüse, Les Hautes-Alpes) |
Finally climbing. My fingertips sizzle as I pull on. The glassy limestone is so hot I swear it's radiating a mirage. My shoe rubber melts and fuses to my feet. It's hard to believe 6c is only 5.11a. We climb and climb and end the day with an exhausted Dylan tying into a 50-meter rig as eager rainclouds trundle in to watch the epic. He slogs it out to the cheers of both me and the booming thunder. We pack up and limp into town. Probably from sheer survival necessity, my French is far better than I remember as we order dinner. What a great day.
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| This is a single pitch. This is an 80-meter rope. This is a stopper knot. Thanks Céüse. (La Vrai Vie, Grande Face) |
| May 22, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| Papyrus | Lead / Onsight | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.10c Sport |
| Antéquéra | Lead / Flash | Ceuse > Grande Face | 5.11a Sport |
| Un éléphant ca trompe énormément | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Grande Face | 5.11a Sport |
| Un éléphant ca trompe énormément | Lead / Redpoint | Ceuse > Grande Face | 5.11a Sport |
...
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| That up there is the alleged best crag in the world, but it comes at the steep price of a full-body approach. (Céüse, Les Hautes-Alpes) |
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| Oh, you better bet... |
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| ... that there'll be photos... |
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| ... of crag dogs? |
| May 23, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| l'Épée Soleil | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Thorgal | 5.10a Sport |
| Ananda | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Cascade | 5.11d Sport |
| Médecine douce | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Cascade | 5.11c Sport |
| Médecine douce | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Cascade | 5.11c Sport |
...
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| Pressed between the colours of diagenesis the stone then wood and sky. (Secteur Cascade, Montagne de Céüse) |
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| Cleaning gear off overhangs means massive struggle, massive swings, and trippy photos. (Super Mickey, Secteur Cascade) |
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| Not thrilled about thirst pics but according to Ani, every dating profile needs a shirtless waterfall. (Secteur Cascade, Montagne de Céüse) |
| May 26, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| Harley Davidson | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.11a Sport |
| Lapinerie | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12b Sport |
| Lapinerie | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12b Sport |
| Lapinerie | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12b Sport |
...
Distrustful of the weather, we drive west through fields of lavender and cherry orchards and the idyllic countryside to the sleeper crag of Saint-Léger-du-Ventoux. Dylan helpfully suggests me to stop being a bitch and try harder. I hesitantly follow his lead and warm up on 7a. I'm pumped out of my gourd yet manage to flash the climb. We tie in to work a 7b+ that I thought I'd have no chance on. I somehow make all the moves. My skin can't handle any more. Dylan dutifully goes up one last time to hang the draws.
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| A grimpeur mid-clip on the rolling limestone overhangs. (Face Nord, Saint-Léger-du-Ventoux) |
| May 27, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| Macadam Cow-boy | Lead / Flash | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.11d Sport |
| La Chevauchée Fantastique | Lead / Flash | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.11d Sport |
| Roland Culet | Lead / Fell/hung | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.12c Sport |
...
In the country hardly anyone speaks a lick of English. It's been reassuring to discover my iron command of French hasn't completely rusted away, especially when there's food on the line.
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| Was there any doubt there'd be escargot? (6ème Sens, Chorges) |
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| I thought canard was a bad word. A delicious, delicious bad word. (6ème Sens, Chorges) |
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| In the birthplace of haute-cuisine, yours truly gets the country-style veal. (6ème Sens, Chorges) |
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| Well we got some Michelin lobster too. (Les Inséperables, Aix-En-Provence) |
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The weather takes us to Saint-Léger again. I try hard to keep my try-hard. Despite goldfish memory, I take down all my to-do's including the punny Roland Culet ( « roh l'enculé! » ...translate it, I'll wait). It was way too long of a climb to catch on camera but not to go home empty-handed I filmed the beta-intensive Les Rifougneurs.Peep the vid! Comment and smash that Like and Subscribe fam!!
| May 29, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| La Chevauchée Fantastique | Lead / Redpoint | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.11d Sport |
| Roland Culet | Lead / Fell/Hung | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.12c Sport |
| Roland Culet | Lead / Redpoint | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.12c Sport |
| Les Rifougneurs | Lead / Fell/Hung | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.12a Sport |
| Les Rifougneurs | Lead / Redpoint | Saint Léger du Ventoux > Face Nord | 5.12a Sport |
...
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| The stern face of the cliff band ushers us back in, its thin smile a grim horizontal line. (Secteur Biographie, Montage de Céüse) |
Back in Céüse as Dylan keeps pushing me to saddle up. I owe him such a debt of gratitude from all I've learned in just a week. I'm thoroughly wrecked from yesterday but a kind Australian offers to hang draws on our project. Professional climber Matt Segal snakes in and casually hikes it. Not looking to disappoint, my creaky body thrashes to the top. The need for a rest day cannot be overstated.
Peep the vid! Comment and smash that Like and Subscribe fam!!
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| Alright last dog tax I promise (Secteur Demi Lune, Montagne de Céüse) |
| May 30, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| Harley Davidson | Lead / Redpoint | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.11a Sport |
| Lapinerie | Lead / Redpoint | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12b Sport |
| Angel Dust | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12a Sport |
...
Here are some photos of the French countryside:
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| Swaths of mimosa and cypress populate the sweeping hills. (Ballons, Drôme) |
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| Along the fallow fields rain and rainbows brighten up a muted sky. (Sigoyer, Les Hautes-Alpes) |
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| The only penitents left to worship at this chapel are its yellow-legged gulls. (Chapelle Saint-Michel de Prunières, Lac de Serre-Ponçon) |
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Céüse is a rotating door of climbing Who's Who. Professionals Jonathan Siegrist and Shaina Savoy philosophize with Mélissa Le Nevé underneath the mega-line Biographie as I meekly squeeze by to grab my gear. I unknowingly chat with Leici Hendrix, executive producer of Climbing Gold. The hardest climb in the world was recently sent by Sébastien Bouin, who's casually perched on a rock nearby, legs crossed in repose like a pensive chess player. I try not to stare. I'm probably staring.
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| Sisyphean approaches and mischievous weather for the view from this tower. (Secteur Demi Lune, Montagne de Céüse) |
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| Natalie tic-tacs her way up an ultra-classic. (Angel Dust, Secteur Demi Lune) |
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| Ammonites harken back to the Jurassic Age, a stoic reminder of the insignificance of it all. (Secteur Demi Lune, Montagne de Céüse) |
| June 1, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| La Galère | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Un Pont sur l'Infini | 5.11d Sport |
| Mélody Nelson | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12a Sport |
| Mélody Nelson | Lead / Redpoint | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12a Sport |
| La Javanaise | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.11d Sport |
...
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| A grand view waves for Dylan's attention as he's distracted by something to the left. (Ceillac, Les Hautes-Alpes) |
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| Charming towns... |
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| ... and castles dot the countryside expanse. (Château de Sigoyer Malpoil, Sigoyer) |
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| We pick up Ruben hitchhiking out of a rough spot. I feel a karmic debt slightly repaid for all my own travelling close calls. (Guillestre, Les Hautes-Alpes) |
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| It's been good for my soul to have free reign on food again. (La Farandole du goût, Embrun) |
| June 2, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| Angel Dust | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12a Sport |
| Angel Dust | Lead / 1-hang | Ceuse > Secteur Demi Lune | 5.12a Sport |
| Saint George's Picos | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ceuse > Secteur Biographie | 5.11d Sport |
...
It's fully summer now. Western green lizards rustle underfoot as the heady aroma of blooming rapeseed and wildflowers set hordes of bees buzzing to work. Hidden in the lush woods, cuckoo birds chime their signature tune at an odd hour. I spend my last few days sampling as much climbing and culture before setting off to Austria to visit old friends. Au revoir, Céüse. Sa fait du bien.
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| An unexpected chance for me to highline and tick off a bucket list item. Patrick improves startlingly quickly. (Sillschlucht, Innsbruck) |
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| Thanks Andi Lukas Simsim Patrick Toby and Masha for the best crew I could've asked for. (Vivan die Eismanufaktur, Ötz) |
Peep the vid! Comment and smash that Like and Subscribe fam!!
| June 5, 2022 Ticklist | |||
| It's your time | Lead / Onsight | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.10a Sport |
| Mikado | Lead / Onsight | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.10+ Sport |
| Blitzaktion | Lead / Fell/Hung | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.11d Sport |
| Blitzaktion | Lead / Redpoint | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.11d Sport |
| Boys don't cry | Lead / 1-hang | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.11b Sport |
| Boys don't cry | Lead / Redpoint | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.11b Sport |
| Karambolage | Lead / 1-hang | Ötztal > Tumpen, Engelswand | 5.10c Sport |
...
[CÉÜSE CLIMBING INFORMATION BETA]
Most climbers camp at the site in Les Guérins. There are plenty of gîtes and Airbnbs a smidge farther away in Gap or Tallard, but any drive pales in comparison to the hike in. Main grocery and equipment shopping can be done in the nearest town Gap or the Intermarché off N85. There's also a artisanal butcher and grocer for finer foods at Charolais Des Alpes. You can take the train in but I can't imagine living here without renting a car.
The famed approach is indeed an hour long, all uphill. Besides the main parking lot, La Chèvrerie has one for a bit of a closer walk. The climate and proximity to a ski resort makes this a summertime crag. The unrelenting sun is unavoidable so just time your hike with where you want to climb, or go up early and spend the day reading, lunching, and napping. With the polished limestone you'll definitely want shade climbing.
The west sectors of Cascade and Thorgal have the hardest approach but are in morning shade. Make sure to break off trail to the right before the mini waterfall. The east sector Grande Face goes shady a bit after noon. All the southern walls gain shade around 3pm. The sun doesn't set until 9pm.
Due to the sustained approach, many stash their gear along the mountain either at the base of the crag or at the last crossroads before you commit to a sector. Make sure you keep an eye on the weather or invest in a dependable dry-bag! Meteoblue is the weather source for locals. Forget about Google.
The best guide is either Vertical Life or the physical book you can (should) buy locally in town. Avoid Rockfax (colloquially: Wankfax) like the plague.
[CÉÜSE REST DAY BETA]
There are tons of hiking and biking around the area. Lac Saint-Anne near Ceillac is a great moderate hike for active recovery. For the ambitious, try the crag approach (again lul) and go up the via ferrata to the top of the Céüse plateau proper. Nearby are swimming spots at Gorges de la Méouge to the southwest or Savines-le-Lac to the northeast. The medieval town of Sisteron is worth a visit or a bit farther the snooty Aix-en-Provence to sample the art and regional terroir of the Côte d'Azur. The highest city in France, Briançon, is not far away up in the Alps. Marseilles and Nice are a couple hours away for full-on city life.
[CÉÜSE FOOD BETA]
The towns are littered with "snack pizzas." There are supermarkets within easy driving distance in Tallard, Gap, and farther. Skip the mediocre cafes in Tallard and go straight to La Boulangerie Le Vieux Four off N85 where you can grab pastries, café, and sandwiches for lunch.
In the nearby area, standout restaurants have been Auberge du Moulin, 6ème Sens, and La Farandole du goût. If driving to Saint-Léger-Du-Ventoux you must stop at the Boulangerie Au Soleil Levain for their carrot cake and vegan offerings. It's run by the cutest lady and I am overwhelmed with nostalgia thinking about her. A bit farther in Aix-en-Provence is the Michelin-mentioned Les Inséparables. Many are small restaurants so make reservations and keep your French dictionary close as hardly anyone speaks English.
Bon voyage. Shoutout to Crystal :P
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