Un Mundo Tan Hermoso 2022-23

The chosen one kindling bonfire atop an unshakeable pair the dragonslayer and the executioner (Las Agujas, El Potrero Chico)

Three months ago, in a quiet New England hostel, I worked with two young women. We are twelve years apart, with nothing in common. One had me on blast, 24/7. Both kept me in my place. Two weeks later, somehow, we had bonded extremely deeply. On my two days driving home, it was the first time I'd cried saying goodbye. With the threat of immense bodily harm, they encouraged me to reunite in Mexico. I guess I'm going rock climbing.

This was definitely the first take. They definitely did not demand a trillion takes (Handshake Speakeasy, Roma Norte)

Ciudad de México. One of the few places in my book that goes toe-to-toe with New York City, Shanghai and Tokyo. It feels great to be back. I waste no time sniping down my favourite bars.

A chapulín and a hoja santa garnish this very locally-inspired cocktail (Handshake Speakeasy, Roma Norte) 

A slightly over-buttered old-fashioned but WHO CARES IT'S GOT MUSHROOMS (Handshake Speakeasy, Roma Norte)

Honestly if you slap capers on a cocktail I promise I'll always like it (Hanky Panky, La Juarez)

Rachel and Abi's friend Omar meets us for the rest of our time in Mexico City. We bond over food and music. He excitedly shares all his local joints as I doubly-excitedly hoover up everything we find. Heaven is Mexican food.

I haven't gone clubbing in literally years so thankfully chamorros are the best hangover cure for being crudo (Ricas carnitas "LUPILLO," Roma Norte) 

Hey Omar I think el camotero is not understanding me, can you translate that I want ALL the camotes. Not some. All. (La Condesa, Ciudad de México)

Not sure what's more excessive Omar's gang signs or Rachel's Melania-steez (Pirámide del Sol, San Juan Teotihuacán)

A requisite for visiting national monuments is having impeccable hair (Castillo de Chapultepec, Miguel Hidalgo)

...

Omar returns to Puebla as the rest of the team truck over to Guadalajara. I get strangely ill here but it doesn't stop me from chasing my dreams. I mean, tequila is good for killing bacteria right? 

They taught us how to savour and drink tequila properly but next thing I knew we were doing pours straight to the face 🤷 (Tequila Tres Mujeres, Jalisco) 

These tequilas age, oddly, in Cupcake Wine barrels from California. Like weird delicious alien egg sacs (Tequila Tres Mujeres, Jalisco)

...

I regrettably leave the gals as I move onwards alone towards Puerto Vallarta. Having been to the beach a grand total of once (1) this year I felt like I might as well. Time to unleash my natural surfing talent harhar.

Hymns of Christmas mass emanate from the parish rising above the city (Parroquia de Nuestra Señora de Guadalupe, Puerto Vallarta) 

Katherine and Simone look calm. I calmly try to not tilt over into the calmly raging waterfall (Yelapa Cascada, Yelapa)

Nacho sacrifices his feet for his sneakers wading the two inch river a man's gotta have priorities (Yelapa, Jalisco)

My strange illness turns worse. It's Christmas Eve. Everything changes.

Santa gifts me COVID this year. Can't I just get a bag of coal instead?

I lose my taste and smell. Rotisserie chicken, roast potatoes, and the spiciest salsa land dead on my tongue. I might as well be eating in a dream. Mexican coffee, already struggling to deliver any kick, is now a puddle of lukewarm water. Taste loss is supposed to be a COVID-19 symptom. As in, from 2019. I thought we've mutated past that? What cruel irony that I've outlasted all this time only to be struck with the worst original symptom for my food-motivated personality. I can't quarantine here, I'm in an 8-bed hostel dormitory. The beachy Christmas hotels are over $400 a night. I make an agonizing choice to keep onwards to El Potrero Chico... we stick with the plan. 

...

After a few days of solitude I'm timidly ready to leave the nest. My partner is irrepressibly cavalier but I double-mask and social distance the way only an introvert with personal space anxiety can.

A little corral of arroyos several pitches and the echoes of climbing commands (Space Boys, La Selva)

December 26, 2022 Ticklist
Black Cat Bone	Onsight	El Potrero Chico > La Selva (Jungle Wall)	5.10d Sport 9 pitches

...

The spires of Potrero reach up pointing towards the Time Wave Buttress (Aguja Celo Rey, Las Agujas)

Today's mission is to scope out Time Wave Zero, our first big climbing target. We immediately get lost on the approach. We finally make it to the foothill and immediately get lost on the climb. Our success looks grim.

Eric pastes himself to the wall sheltering from the abseilers and scorching heat (Gettin' Wood, Las Agujas)

My partner makes a rare appearance sitting upon his throne (Aguja Celo Rey, Las Agujas)

December 27, 2022 Ticklist
A Time For War	Follow	El Potrero Chico > Time Wave Buttress	5.7 Sport
Time Wave Zero	Follow	El Potrero Chico > Time Wave Buttress	5.11a Sport Pitch 2
Aguja Celo Rey	Lead / Onsight	El Potrero Chico > Las Agujas (The Spires)	5.10a Sport
Off The Notch	Lead / Onsight	El Potrero Chico > Las Agujas (The Spires)	5.10 Sport

...

We wake up at 3:00AM for Time Wave Zero. I make a quick breakfast of huevos y frijoles. I'm still learning the correct proportions for instant coffee. I'm way overcaffeinated on top of concern about my fatiguing and vertiginous COVID symptoms and the need to perform on Pitch #21 which goes at 5.12a. The jitters grip me hard as I dance out the cabin at 4:00AM. Little do I know that'd be the least of my worries.

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December 29, 2022 Ticklist
Time Wave Zero	Fell/Hung	El Potrero Chico > Time Wave Buttress	5.12a Sport 23 Pitches
Time Wave Zero	Fell/Hung	El Potrero Chico > Time Wave Buttress	5.12a Sport Pitch 21

...

Today we run into Felix and Matthew from Time Wave Zero again as they're rampaging down Yankee Clipper. Also on the wall are Olin and Alejandro who happen to be friends with Ian from Rumney. The climbing world is small and peculiar. We become fast friends when we're stuck with each other on the side of a mountain.

December 31, 2022 Ticklist
Yankee Clipper	Fell/Hung	El Potrero Chico > La Selva (Jungle Wall)	5.12a Sport 15 Pitches

Alejandro is way too chipper after six hours on the wall in the baking sun (Yankee Clipper, La Selva)

My digitally paranoid climbing partner won't show his face even for epic summits (Yankee Clipper, La Selva) 

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A new year rings in and goes. Continuing on days of Montezuma's vengeful, icy grip 'pon me bowels, it's a relief to get a single-pitch cragging day with ready access to a bathroom. I get worked on my warmup but manage to take down my goal of the day. Forever the second-try send...

January 2, 2023 Ticklist
Marklar	Lead / Onsight	El Potrero Chico > Las Estrellas	5.10+ Sport
Conflict	Lead / Fell/Hung	El Potrero Chico > Club Mex Wall	5.12b Sport
Conflict	Lead / Redpoint	El Potrero Chico > Club Mex Wall	5.12b Sport
Telegram for Mongo	Lead / Fell/Hung	El Potrero Chico > Club Mex Wall	5.12a Sport

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Mauro and Buka quickly become the stars of the crag (Club Mex Wall, El Potrero Chico)

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Today our mission is to dial in the approach for the mega lines La Sombra Luminosa and El Sendero Luminoso. One day I'll come back stronger, wiser and better-looking, and take them down.

Pioneering off into my first slot canyon amphitheater (Beyond Plutonia, El Potrero Chico)

The amount of rappelling we've done this trip is enough for two lifetimes (Señorita Woblita, Beyond Plutonia)

Hurtling through a canyon a corridor unreal to hear the rythmic corrido up this shadowy path (La Sombra Luminosa, Beyond Plutonia)

January 3, 2023 Ticklist
La Sombra Luminosa	Follow	El Potrero Chico > Beyond Plutonia	5.10+ Sport Pitch 1
La Sombra Luminosa	Lead / Onsight	El Potrero Chico > Beyond Plutonia	5.10+ Sport Pitch 2
El Sendero Luminoso	Follow	El Potrero Chico > Land of the Free	5.12a Sport Pitch 1

...

A few more long days of multi-pitches and hard trying. I close out my climbing a muerte. Despite a battered body and wrecked ankles I am all smiles.

January 4, 2023 Ticklist
Baked Fresh Daily	Lead / Onsight	El Potrero Chico > TNT Wall	5.10c Sport
Inglorious Bastards	Lead / Flash	El Potrero Chico > TNT Wall	5.12a Sport
Jesus Caballero	Follow	El Potrero Chico > The Vatican	5.11c Sport

January 5, 2023 Ticklist
Pancho Villa Rides Again	Onsight	El Potrero Chico > Mota Wall	5.10c Sport 5 Pitches
Snot Girlz	Onsight	El Potrero Chico > Mota Wall	5.10+ Sport 7 Pitches

Just in case you thought I didn't get tacos in Mexico go ahead and put those fears to rest (El Crux, Hidalgo) 

Pueblos in a nutshell. The dog's expression with his pal gallina is perfection (Leo's Tacos Grill, Hidalgo) 

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My time here winds to a close. I savour the last of it all before an early morning flight to California where my father awaits. Adiós again, México. I slept on you for so long but I've come to love you so, so much. Volveré pronto, I promise.

“You get a strange feeling when you're about to leave a place [...] you'll not only miss the people you love but you'll miss the person you are now at this time and this place, because you'll never be this way ever again.” - Azar Nafisi (Hidalgo, Nuevo León)